Uch

I'm a bad bad Jew

(Non-Jewish) Co-worker: Did you remember to bring in your copy of "Friday Night Lights"?

Me: Shit, I forgot. Sorry about that.

Co-worker: Don't worry. Try to remember to bring it in on Friday if you can.

Me [looking puzzled]: Friday? Tomorrow's Thursday, right? I'll bring it in tomorrow.

Co-worker: Aren't you taking off for Rosh Hashanah?

Me: Wait a sec. It starts tonight? For real? I could've sworn it started tomorrow night. Nah, I'll be in the office tomorrow. And Friday too, for that matter.

Co-worker: You're not really up on the whole Jewish thing anymore, are you?

Me: G, if we actually believed in hell that's exactly where I'd be headed.


Notwithstanding the above exchange, I want to wish all of my fellow Members of the Tribe a happy and sweet new year and a joyous High Holiday season (or at least until that whole Yom Kippur day of atonement fast thing kicks off).

L'SHANAH TOVAH TIKATEYVU.